hi ladies
Ive broken up with someone after 3 yrs,and im finding things hard,as she wants to be mates(to be safe and not get hurt) yet shes told me she loves me(well has feelings -her words and cant say no more about that,cos she keeps them in herself),she dont like talking about feelings.
We have been apart 6 months,and i went to see her,and she seemed pleased to see me,we talked about stuff from the yr before and to cut a long story short we spent the night together ,as mates,bu the next day she was huggin up to me ,and being abit frisky so she obviously likes me in that way still,but she and i stopped things going further.
I texted and she texted me all that week and it was great,we got close again,i went to see her a few days later and she and i got close again,but the next day after spending time together and her family etc,she said shed see me in a weeks time,i felt abit gutted to be frank,and she said 'well i did tell you i didnt want a rel yet,i want to see someone twice a week ,no ties'
so i said sorry no can do,why lead me on?
she said id asked to stay at hers which i did yes,but she was the one who drove the car! i didnt make her,and she was the one who got close to me hugging me and talking about plans for the furture with me i felt,and acting like my lover in bed,still.
So all the next week we have been mailing,she seems anxious and mailing alot and i am too,we dont want to lsoe one another,she has explained she was hurt but she hurt me too last yr first b4 i did anything to her back thru my hurt.
Her sis says to me she has very strong feelings for me and other things too she says she wont reveal,like my ex loves me still..
i kept my distance this week and she seems cross with me and mails me these mails blaming me one min then saying she gets how i feel ,that some ppl keep there feelings inside them,so i feel i cant win right now,it took alot for me to go round there in the first place!
I care for her and if she wants to be mates fine but i know she loves me the way she is with me,body lang and stuff,but shes not being fair on my head,if she means it and want to be mates why is she making me feel guilty and pestering me cos im not saying shes got to be with me to her,or anything,im saying to her the way i feel its hard for me to be just mates,and she said she cares etc so why cant she accept the way i feel,and give me time?
Maybe i should be her mate ,for now,shes studying and stressed as got exams,shes 28 and im 30 nearly..she says commited to work and cant commit to me,but i wont let her have me for her uses and sod how i feel,not after 3 yrs..
if she cared for me she would understand how i feel.
anyone been in a similar place?
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