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Late to it Lesbians.Contains "mature" content, but not necessarily adult.[email protected] 
  
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gay parents : are you a gay parent?
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Reply
Recommend  Message 1 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamejandancer33  (Original Message)Sent: 12/1/2002 2:25 PM
hi ladies,
 
we have cham to thank for this board, (thanx hun)  she requested the idea a few days ago.
 
it can be hard enough, bringing up kids, for straight couples, so adding the fact that you're gay to the equation, well???
 
this board is here for you to talk about your kids...
how you feel about them knowing you are gay? how to tell them....
you can ask the opinions of other parents....
share your own experiences....
anything you want, to do with your kids...
 
as most of you know, i have a 16yo daughter.  she has grown up, with me as a straight mum, for as long as i thought myself straight, she obviously thought the same...  then a fe months ago, i decided time to tell her the truth...
i had put off doing so, due to all sorts of stuff going on, problems, exams, etc, and i do think waiting was the right choice for me....
anyhow, i told her, and she was fine about it, we talk about it openly, and she knows that if she has a question, i'm here to answer if i can....
i do wish, that i'd had the courage, many years ago, to admit to myself, that i was gay, then she could have grown up with the fact, and not had it sprung, quite out of the blue, lol....
but all ended well....
 
anyway, hope all of our gay mums find use with the board...
luv janx
 
 


First  Previous  16-30 of 30  Next  Last 
Reply
Recommend  Message 16 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamejandancer33Sent: 5/1/2003 12:06 PM
hi tazy
thanx for posting your experiences, it gives other members hope, when they read stories like this
and so happy that it all went well for you too.
my daughter was, (and is)  great about me being lesbian aswell, so think we're both very lucky!
anyways, hope we see more of you around the site
luv janx

Reply
Recommend  Message 17 of 30 in Discussion 
From: BlackjadeSent: 5/1/2003 6:33 PM
Hi Jan
 
Yeah in my haert I know this and I do bring my kids up to accept gays as they see my friends and their partners together all the time and I talk openly with my daughter about anything she has questions on........... and in my heart of heart I know now would be the best time to tell them.
 

Reply
Recommend  Message 18 of 30 in Discussion 
From: tazySent: 5/2/2003 12:06 AM



janx thanks... all of a sudden ive started getting all these messeges for
lateit to lesbians so i dont know whats happened...lol
may have just learnt how to work this thing properlyxxxx
and yes im hopeing to participate more in the conversations sounds like it
is quite funny at times and is also good to have people outside to chat to
with thingsxxxx hope to chat to you all soonxxxx



>From: "janx" <[email protected]>
>Reply-To: "Late to it Lesbians." <[email protected]>
>To: "Late to it Lesbians." <[email protected]>
>Subject: Re: are you a gay parent?
>Date: Thu, 1 May 2003 04:06:40 -0700
>


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Reply
Recommend  Message 19 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamejandancer33Sent: 5/2/2003 1:06 AM
jade
if your kids are growing up around lesbians/gays, and they accept it's normal, then  the telling them thing will come naturally, and you'll know when that is, be it next week, or next year!
anyway, good luck hun, don't think you'll have any problems though
luv janx
 
tazy
you can select what emails arrive at your inbox by clicking on 'members tool' and then 'view my email settings'
you can get all the messages sent, or a daily, or weekly digest, or, you can select to get just messages that you want to read about by coming into the community, opening the thread that interests you, and at the top of the page, click, 'send replies to my inbox'
hope this helps hun, see you round  x
 
hugs
janx

Reply
Recommend  Message 20 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknamelezbiscouseSent: 5/2/2003 10:59 AM




Jan you seem to know lots about puter am having so much trouble cant find my
sig you did for me , cant download my digi cam as damn thing does not work
and it brand new got it as a pressie my copy and paste do not work so cant
join in questionaires, wich stress me out.

So Jan if I invite you for tea would you show me how to do these thing
please.

fanny i

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Recommend  Message 21 of 30 in Discussion 
From: koolSent: 5/10/2003 10:08 PM
Hi ladies
 
I just want to thank all of you for your support and advice about my eldest daughter.
 
The really good news is that she is talking about coming home. We had a long chat today about all sorts including my partner who has been more than helpful - she was actually going to let me go so I could get my daughter back.
 
My daughter has now stated that she can accept me being gay and we are going to try to meet each other half way and work things out.
 
Thanks again for your support and help.
 
Luv Kool

Reply
Recommend  Message 22 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nickname_Katekitty_Sent: 5/10/2003 10:19 PM
I'm really glad your daughter is talking about coming home karl, here's hoping things will soon sort themselves out. Wishing you both the best of luck
 

Reply
Recommend  Message 23 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamejandancer33Sent: 5/11/2003 12:18 AM
made up for ya karl x
hope this is the end of your troubles!
good luck darlin
luv janx

Reply
Recommend  Message 24 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamepooks0Sent: 5/12/2003 9:42 PM
hi, realise i should have put my message about talking to my kids in here.I am in a relationship with a wonderful woman with whom i am hoping to start a home. she has lived an openly gay lifestyle for many years, whereas i have only realised my sexuality in the last year following a divorce. I have 2 children, aged 11 & 9, aboy & girl, and we both want to be honest with them, but also want to get it right. Most importantly, we want them to be told honestly about things instead of them realising but having no one to talk about it with.I posted my request for advice on the general board and had wonderful replies, thankyou. I will share with you as i progress through the next few weeks/ months. xxx                                 great to hear about you & your daughter, KoolX                                                                                                                                                       

Reply
Recommend  Message 25 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameMAGDOLINUK1Sent: 5/14/2003 8:32 AM
realy pleased for you  kool hope it all works well xxxxxxxx

Reply
Recommend  Message 26 of 30 in Discussion 
From: TrixiebellSent: 5/19/2003 9:12 PM
Hi folks
Just wanted to say how good it is to see so many replies in here.  One can feel so alone sometimes when bringing up a child, especially as lesbian parent.  My son is now 5 years old and is a very happy well adjusted child although he really misses his sister and my ex partner (See message the kids on the board!).  He will be brought up to be open minded and know that all people are different.  I don't think at the moment that I would tell him about me being lesbian but he knows that mummy likes girls!(:O)  The daddy question is coming up now but I feel h e is still too young to understand the donor thing, that does not mean that I am lying to him just that I will tell him when I think he is ready to understand.  It was never my intention to be a single parent but c'est la vie, we can only do our best and hope our kids grow up to be individual, open minded and caring people who embrace society as a whole!
Regards to all, Sweetxxxx 

Reply
Recommend  Message 27 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nicknamejandancer33Sent: 5/20/2003 1:14 AM
hi again sweet
nice to hear from you hun!
and thank you for bringing up one of the new, open minded, generation of kids!  it's the only way we'll ever have a peacefull, accepting society, is by doing right by our kids, so well done darlin!
and the doner dad thing... your boys young, too young to understand all that  i think you are doing the right thing by not confusing him with all that right now... 
hope things go ok for you hun, good luck in your future
and dont be a stranger!
luv janx

Reply
Recommend  Message 28 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknamePickledKez30Sent: 8/5/2003 5:30 PM
Hello Jan
I have 4 kids and their ages range from 11, 8, 7, and 4.  Me and my g/f have been together for 3 years and she has known the my youngest since she was 18 months old.  So she has been more of a parent towards my little girl than her own father.  After a few months of us being tog...i told them about us and they were all ok about it, even the youngest boy who was 5 at the time was ok about it.  And coz we lived in london..which is full of lesbians and gays..they got used to it.  And we have friends who have kids as well, so they know they are not the only ones out there who have gay parenting.  My eldest 2 kids actually stand up for them selves in sch now...if someone comes up to them and winds them up about us being lesbians, they either walk away or say so what of it, they are happy.  And they also know about transvestites...so they are quiet open minded about most things.  
But there is one question i need to ask....do kids all wind up or disobey the other person in the relationship...meaning the non biological parent. Coz my g/f has probs with this...and i have to intervene.  Or could it be coz of her age she has been with them since she 18 and she is now 21.  She has no kids her self.  Do you reckon this makes a difference.
from kez and jazz

Reply
Recommend  Message 29 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN Nickname«ƒëMmè_67»Sent: 9/17/2003 8:57 PM
OMG JAN...I'VE BEEN A MEMBER HERE SINCE EARLY APRIL..AND JUST REALIZED WHAT THIS BOARD IS ABOUT...IF I'D HAVE KNOWN SOONER...LOL...ANYWAY...I'VE GOT 3 KIDS...MY 17 YR OLD DAUGHTER HAS KNOWN FOR ALMOST 2 YRS...SHE HAD A FEW PROBS WITH IT AT FIRST...BUT SEEMS TO BE OK WITH IT NOW...AND WANTS ME TO BE HAPPY...MY 13 YR OLD SON JUST FOUND OUT...AND WE REALLY HAVEN'T GOTTEN TO DISCUSS HIS FEELINGS AS HE LIVES WITH HIS FATHER...I KNOW HE LOVES ME AND WANTS ME TO BE HAPPY...AND MY 4 YR OLD DOESN'T REALLY KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON...EXCEPT IT'S "HER SUSY" AND NOT MINE LOL...I HAVE NO RESERVES ABOUT RAISING MY KIDS IN A GAY ENVIRONMENT...AS THEY WILL BE JUST AS LOVED AND CARED FOR...BY BOTH OF US...MY BIG THING IS MY FAMILY DOESN'T ACCEPT ME..AND THINKS I WILL RUIN MY KIDS' LIFE BY RAISING THEM IN A GAY "WORLD"...AND ARE DOING EVERYTHING THEY CAN TO GET MY LITTLE ONES DAD TO TAKE HER AWAY FROM ME SO I CAN'T RAISE HER IN THIS ENVIRONMENT...I KNOW IT WON'T WORK...BUT THE KEEP TRYING...I JUST WANT MY KIDS TO GROW UP HAPPY...WITH PARENTS THAT LOVE THEM...ANY SUGGESTIONS ON HOW I CAN HANDLE THIS

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Recommend  Message 30 of 30 in Discussion 
From: MSN NicknameJan_mgr1Sent: 9/17/2003 11:29 PM
hi ladies,
 
first of all, i want to say that i think its great that you're all pushing to bring up your kids in open gay relationships...   only by teaching our kids that it's ok, will we change the attitude of the next generation, so well done!
 
kez&jazz,
kids will push to see how far it will get them, to see how far they can go with different people. and all kids are different, so what would work in one situation, would not in another.  but whatever thier reason, let them know that her word is as yours, that you agree on what they can and cant do, allow her to lay down a pre-arranged punishment, so your not having to intervene.
kids will be kids, but as long as you lay down rules, then stick to them, they'll get the message that they can't mess around like this.
 
femme,
its terrible what your family are doing, get yourself a sympathetic solicitor. no one in thier right mind would allow a child to be removed from a happy, stable environment, to be taken into one where predjustice is shown.
all i can do is wish you all the luck in the world, and keep showing your kids that its right to be open minded, and wrong to pre-judge.
 
hugs to all
janx

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