Late to it Lesbians.

1 . What's the difference between a porcupine and a BMW?
A porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
2. What's the best form of birth control after 50?
Nudity
3. What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
45 kilos.
4. What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
45 minutes.
5. How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
None, they just sit there in the dark and bitch.
6. What's the fastest way to a man's heart?
Through his chest with a sharp knife.
  8. What have men and floor tiles got in common?
If you lay them properly the first time, you can walk all over them for
life.
9. Why do men want to marry virgins?
They can't stand criticism.
10. Why is it so hard for women to find men that are
sensitive,caring and good looking?
Because those men already have boyfriends.

11. What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
12. What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of
driving.
13. What is the biggest problem for an atheist?
No one to talk to during orgasm.
14. What do you call a smart blonde?
A golden retriever.
15. Why does the bride always wear white?
Because it's good for the dishwasher to match the stove and
refrigerator.
16. A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in sixth grade. Who
has the biggest boobs?
The blonde, because she's 18.

17. Which sexual position produces the ugliest children?
Ask your Mom.
18. How do you know when you're really ugly?
Dogs hump your leg with their eyes closed.
19. How do you know when you're leading a sad life?
When a nymphomaniac tells you, "Lets just be friends."
20. Why don't bunnies make noise when they have sex?
Because they have cotton balls.
21. What does a 75 year old woman have between her breasts?
Her navel.
22. What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies?
A Bingo Machine.
23. Why did God create alcohol?
So ugly people could have sex too.
24. What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant?
"Are you sure it's mine?"
   27. If you are having sex with two women and one more walks in, what
do you have?
Divorce proceedings most likely.


31. What does it mean when the flag at a US Post Office is flying at
half mast?
They're hiring.

32. What do toilets, a clitoris, and an anniversary have in common?
Men miss them all.
33. Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
  36. What do you call a New Zealand farmer with a sheep under each
arm?
A Pimp.

Q. Why do women call it PMS?
A. Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

Q. What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Q. What's the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Q. What's the definition of macho?
A. Jogging home from your own vasectomy.

Q. What's the difference between a G-Spot and a golf ball?
A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball.

Q. Why is divorce so expensive?
A. Because it's worth it.

Q. What do you call a lesbian with fat fingers?
A. Well-hung.

Q. Why do gay men wear ribbed condoms?
A. For traction in the mud.

Q: Why don't men fake orgasm?
A: Cos no man would pull those faces on purpose.

Q. Why do most women pay more attention to their appearance than improving
their minds ?
A. Because most men are stupid but few are blind.

Important Announcement The MSN Groups service will close in February 2009. You can move your group to Multiply, MSN’s partner for online groups. Learn More
Late to it Lesbians.	[email protected]