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It has taken me some time to write on here recently I was diagnosed with Copd by my gp the main thing was I have to stop smoking eat healthy and try to excercise more which can be awkward with my spine problems ect and Stress is also a thing I dont need because it can make the situtaion worse with stopping smoking I was told I could live for years with this I am 47 they is no known cure but what life brings we cant stop. I told my family and my eldest girl already has me dead and buried?? she has got most of the family thinking I am dying and seriously ill having to try and explain to them the situation has been very hard she came back up for a week and we talked over and over about things and I told her the last thing I needed was stress and she agreed and said sorry then since thursday this week she has caused a lot of trouble again in derby by threatening the local gang around here over my youngest lad was threatened by them it had calmed down untill she came back here now the gang of mainly teenagers have been ringing Joseph who is at joannes making death threats and one of them a 17 yr old girl then proceeded to tell Jospeh when he next visits here that they will wait till he's out back and rape him (Joseph) is 14 yrs the situation is out of control my daughter is making it a lot worse with her mouth her blokes mouth and his brother who are all supposed to be adults yet they behave worse than the kids and they have told the kids they are coming up to sort them out and she wondered why I got angry with her. I told her I don't need the stress it isnt helping me I feel like running away from it all you know I moved a few hundred miles just over a year ago to get away from the hassel Joanne causes the last thing I want is her doing all this .. I know she loves me all my family do and they are worried yes I but i need peace is that to much to ask Hugs Susy xx |
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| | From:  Fluffa3 | Sent: 5/2/2005 3:28 PM |
Susy I am sorry I dont know what copd is and I am also sorry to hear of the problems you are having. I think one of the difficulties of family life is that because these people are family, we put up with much worse behaviour from them than we ever would from just anybody. I don't know you or your family but, I think if this were me, and for the good of my health, I would be telling my daughter that unless she can behave like an adult, that she shouldn't visit you at the moment. Maybe, you can re-inforce this this with a letter from the GP. That way, it looks as though you are under his/her instructions rather than this being your idea. You have already said that you have moved a long distance away. You also said that you know Joanne loves you. She might love you but, she doesn't seem to have much respect for you or your illness. If you want to chat anytime or just get it off your chest, I'm on messenger and email if that's any help hugs |
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hi susy
really sorry your having to go through this again
maybe fluffa is right, could you speak to a family counsellor, explain the situation, then get joanne and the family to sit in. maybe hearing it like that will have some effect. if not, again, maybe fluffa is right, ask joanne to stay out of the area, and you visit her.
hope you manage to get this sorted out susy
take care
hugs jan x |
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Hi Fuffa and Jan I have told joanne many time's so as the doctor and the nurse she gets upset then and agree's with them then she will still go and do this I have told her not to visit me again and I will visit there during the summer .. Joanne has always been difficult since being younger she has a mind of her own no matter what anyone will say to her Jen has spoken to her at length also without affect I can't really do any more to make her see she knows I'm upset yet shes' going on like nothing's happened ?? I hope in time she will open her eyes and ears but I don't hold out much hope.. Fluffa copd is a lung disease Hugs Susyxx |
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Hi Susy, I'm so sorry that Joanne is being so difficult but sadly, I do know how Joanne is. I know Joanne basically does as Joanne wants but I hope one day sooner than later she'll actually realize what its doing to you and do something about it. Maybe one day you and Jen can get her to realize things, I do know that you've tried very hard. Being a smoker myself, I also know how hard it is to quit and even harder when you're dealing with a situation like you are faced with at home Lots of big hugs to you Susy  Hugs Jazzy |
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Hi Susy It was good to see you last Friday. I hope you're managing to keep you spirits up - against all odds. I know you're trying your best and I hope your endeavours go well this week. I'll be thinking of you. Take care babes Hugs and Love Louise xxx |
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| | | From: pooks0 | Sent: 5/3/2005 6:49 AM |
Hi Susy,sorry you're going through so much.None of this is helping you to look after yourself right now.Can you take a break,get away for even a few days & have time to yourself? Don't be too frightened by COPD,its a term used for a chest condition which is all things to all people...yes it means your lungs have been affected by some trauma..can be recurrent chest infections,smoking,asthma,bronchitis etc,but certainly doesn't mean you are closer to death,hun...stopping smoking will be good,but get all the help you can for this.Trying to exercise a little is good too to help with your breathing..maybe swimming if you have spinal problems?Take time for you now,work out a programme of what you want to achieve & by when,be realistic about your time frame,we're all here to help,hugs,Pookie.x |
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Thankyou for your support ladys means a lot and Pookie I am being positive its others who aint I am working out a programme for myself to help acheive things I have had severe asthama for many years and basically this is a kick start I needed I guess .. The tests helped me realise how important things are the hic cups along the way have to be sorted and given time I am sure I will get there once again thanks ladys Hugs Susyxx |
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 susy i dunno wat to say so im sending a huge hugs huni xx |
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Hi Susy, Just been reading this thread ( sorry I am a bit late on the uptake once again ) I think Joanne just has very deep protective instincts, I know that dosent help you much, but sounds like she is one head strong girl who dosent think of the consequences her actions will bring upon her family, Misplaced Loyalty if thats the right word, she will protect her family no matter what and sort the aftermath out another time, which is unfortunate for you as she can just go home and leave you to pick up the pieces, I t must be very hard for you, but you sound like you are just as strong and very level headed so im sure you will work it out with your daughter. I am sorry to hear of your Illness I truely am and hope your not in too much pain or discomfort Hugs Chez xxxxxx |
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