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| | (Original Message) | Sent: 5/22/2005 6:50 PM |
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| | From:  Fluffa3 | Sent: 5/22/2005 7:05 PM |
Ok am doing this again. Was talking on MSN and accidentally pressed send button here before message finished instead of send on MSN - lol. I have two daughters (nearly 11 and 13) and I love them to bits and am very proud of them. However, I am fed up with sometimes being made to feel a social outcast because I have them. My previous gf also had children but hers were a bit older than mine and her daughter particularly didnt take to the fact that her mum was a lesbian. We didnt live together and sometimes on the weekends I had my girls, she would say she wasn't coming round because they were there. If she did see them, they all got on really well and I never managed to work out whether she was jealous because my kids are ok about my sexuality or whether she felt guilty about spending time with my children when she had problems with her own. My current gf has no children and mostly gets on with mine except for occasionally when I sometimes feel they are all competing for my attention at the same time. However, what has really p***** me off  is that a very good friend of mine who, up until a couple of years ago lived near me and who has children the same age as mine (they all went to school together) has today made me feel an outcast because of the girls. We don't get to see that much of each other any more because she went to live in Belgium for a year and is now living near Oxford. However, we keep in touch and meet up when we can. She texted me to ask if she could come and stay over next Fri as she is taking her children to their Dad for half term. I said that would be great and asked if she was bringing her kids thinking maybe she was going to stay over and then take them to Brighton on Saturday. She said no and I texted back to say that I have mine over that weekend but that we could still catch up on all the news. She replied by saying that she would leave it for another date as she wanted to go out and get drunk. I said ok we will stay in and get drunk then. No reply. Am I being oversensitive here laydeez - I am mostly angry but also quite hurt.  |
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I don't think you are being oversensitive at all Fluffa.....being a single parent is hard enough without people, who should know better, making you feel bad about having the kids around. My kids and I come as a package, while they are still small they are the most important thing in the world to me, and if friends or g/f's have a problem with that then I'm afraid they lose, because my kids come first littlemiss |
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| | | From: Fluffa3 | Sent: 5/23/2005 7:43 AM |
Thank you LittleMiss. That's how I feel too and, I think what made it seem even worse is that this friend is somebody who knows my kids really well and, when we did live closer together was almost like extended family!!!!! |
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((((((( Fluffa ))))))) I know where your comming from on this one .. i have 3 children (10, 7 and 6) and yes you are made out to be a social outcast with them , im lucky in one way tho cos the ex takes them every other weekend so i get a break. Ive been in relationships with women who have got children and also relationships where they dont have children. My kids are the most important people in my life (why shouldnt they be) and we come as a package. I`m lucky as my girlfriend knows this and we made plans on weekends and go out when i dont have them and we make plans with the kids when we do have them. Your not being over sensitve... as a single parent you dont have that amount of spare money and i think your "friend" is being nasty. Just cos your kids are happy with your sexuality , my kids are ok with it ... mind you they are quite young and they have accepted me being happy with my gf. |
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| | | From: Fluffa3 | Sent: 5/23/2005 10:47 PM |
Hi Dizzy My kids live 50/50 with me and their Dad who lives 2 miles away so I do get time to go out with and without them. It just turned out that this weekend they are with me and I really don't understand why my friend couldn't come over anyway. I eventually got a reply that said they are going to Crete on the Sunday and making it sound like that was the reason she had changed her mind. So why did she say in the first place that she wanted to come and stay Friday and go out - anyway that's her problem and maybe next time she might find I'm not so available either!!!! |
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| | | From: pooks0 | Sent: 5/24/2005 6:43 AM |
Awwwwwww,Fluffa,I'm really sad to hear this...s/times friends really surprise us by their actions,s/times in a lovely way,s/times in a hurtful way too.The hardest thing is when people treat you in a way that you would never do.Maybe your friend is going through a spurt of selfishness,it's her loss.You have two wonderful girls,you are a fantastic Mum,& no one can ever take that away.Anyone who does not value your family unit is not a true friend.Just want to send a huge hug to all mums out there,raising their kids,with or without help....you are worth the Earth to your children.You are amazing.hugs,Pooks.xxx |
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| | | From: Fluffa3 | Sent: 5/25/2005 6:59 AM |
aaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhh ty Pooks that is really sweet |
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