One other thing....  If that person that called me an idiot and if i read him i would actually hear "I think i'm an idiot".  Would i react to hearing that differently than I reacted to  you are an idiot?  We feel, we react, but we are also readers. We have to balance those things and going through an experience  and looking it over
will train your mind to see those truths quicker. If someone says... your an idiot I quickly go thru my programming and decide if I choose to own that comment.  I can also decide to hear "I think i'm an idiot" and respond with I think your very bright and smile. 

TBritton : you reminded me of an ill emotion I experienced last weekend.  I had gone to pick up my halloween costume i had reserved about 3 weeks prior and after waiing in line... they said they had mistakenly given it away to someone else.  Which meant pandora's matching costume was pointless as well. I was furious and left quite annoyed. I was nice in the store, but inside I was IRATE!  As i was driving I came to realize that i was upset over a velvet  piece of clothing that a costume, was in full controll of my emotions.  And I decided then, that i would no longer allow "things" to dictate my emotions