You have two choices in life:
You can stay single and be miserable,
or get married and wish you were dead.
At a cocktail party, one woman said to another,
'Aren't you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?'
'Yes, I am. I married the wrong man.'
A lady inserted an ad in the classifieds:
'Husband Wanted'
Next day she received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing:
'You can have mine.'
When a woman steals your husband,
there is no better revenge than to let her keep him.
A woman is incomplete until she is married. Then she is finished.
A little boy asked his father,
'Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?'
Father replied, 'I don't know, son, I'm still paying.'
A young son asked,
'Is it true, Dad, that in some parts of Africa
a man doesn't know his wife until he marries her?'
Dad replied, 'That happens in every country, son'
Then there was a woman who said,
'I never knew what real happiness was until I got married,
and by then, it was too late.'
If you want your spouse to listen and
pay strict attention to every word you say -- talk in your sleep.
Just think, if it wasn't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.
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