A Circus Wedding
“Hurry, Hurry�?Step right up!
Join the funeral procession as it winds toward the merry go round.
Where it’s centerpiece, a clown, the priest, makes mockery of the vows.
See the, Father of the Bride, the bear on skates, roll down the center aisle
While the beautiful bride of the flying trapeze does tight rope over the crowd.
Hear the ring bearer, dog faced boy, give a bark of glee ‘errruph!�?BR>While the flower girl, in skirt and heels, sells, ‘Popcorn! Cigarettes! Cotton Candy!�?/FONT>
See the, Maid of Honor, in her full-grown beard,
Standing across from the, best, strong man,
She gives him a wink, and he replies with a smile.
Now the crowd acknowledges with quiet jeer�?BR>That she is a he�?BR>And he is uhh�?
quite pleased.
So, the groom stands stage right,
and as the bride prepares to dive,
A Volkswagen Beetle comes barreling down the aisle,
Twenty clowns pouring out�?BR>The Geek gives a ‘cry�?
But the clowns spread a net sheerly in time�?
The bride bounces to safety and somersaults in the sky.
With a few odd tucks and a last second half roll
She lands on her feet, to cheers from the crowd,
Spectators in their seats, Erupt in ‘APPLAUSE.�?/FONT>
‘Ladies and gentlemen we have gathered here to day to mourn the passing of Stan and Sheila,
They feel it is time to move to Rhode Island and sell burial insurance to retired people.
So, without further ado,
Stan, do you take Sheila, in her many contortions, sure to make any Zen Buddhist Master go mad
To carry your seed and that of a few circus freaks causing you wonder on most nights why she’s tired?�?/FONT>
‘I do.�?/FONT>
‘Then Sheila�?do you take Stan, as he admires the ass of his best strong man,
To have and to hold, through bankruptcy, fraud, and a second remortgage?�?/FONT>
‘I do.�?/FONT>
‘Then (eh-heh-heh-he-hmm�? by the power vested in me,
By the state of dementia, I hereby pronounce you master and slave,
It all depends on which role you should choose, and how nice you two can play.
Stan, you may now boink the bride. WONKA WONKA WONKA.’�?nbsp;
- Frderikc Greysin Van Zappa (2003(ish)(c))
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