Dear Dr. Fraud, I am plagued by a re-accurring dream. In this dream, I am approached by a large throbbing pulsating object. I am not frightened....but filled with a sharp sense of anticipation. Upon awakening....I find myself softly panting...perspired...heart racing...and a strong sense of aching flowing through my body. Should I be concerned and are these dreams dangerous? How can I prevent them from re-accurring? Signed: Needing to know 
| Dear Needing, No need to be concerned. Many women are seduced into doing the vacuuming, by the throbbing and pulsing of the motor. Try this... Do your housework in the nude and should you feel that familiar, sharp anticipation fill you with an uncontrollable urge, give into it and as the saying goes "kill two birds with one stone." Not only will your house be spotless, but you will no longer dread housework. Sincerely, Dr. Seymon Fraud p.s. if you would like to pick up a few tips... on how to get into those hard to reach places, the cleaning crew in my office is on vacation.  | Dear Doc Fraud. I have this friend named .....Southy. Now everytime I chat online with Southy, she typos backwards and I'm afraid it's contagious. Indeed it is contagious. I find myself typing backwards at times, not knowing what the hell i just typed. Is there a cure for this? Sincerely, Mona Lott | | Dear Mona, Perhaps your friend is affected by forbidden images, that pop into her thoughts as she is typing. Obviously, her mind isn't on what she is doing. Yes my dear, there is a cure for you and your friend. However both of you will have to put some time in, away from the keyboard. Since you both have the problem, it only makes sense that you work together, to get to the bottom of this. I'm sure if your efforts are dilligent and untiring, you will soon be relaxed enough... to make the keyboard viberate under your skilled fingers. Sincerely, Dr. Seymon Fraud p.s. do let me know how this works out, as my own typing has been a little off lately. ljfohgh pllaa plunging kff ;kf a jkfnfbna hot ljllb  | Tã?? | Sent: 4/27/2005 12:30 AM | | Dear Doctor Fraud, I can't help but notice that a friend of mine.. lets call her �?nbsp;Rã?? �?.. seems to to be seeing things.. it appears to her as if she posts in one group and it magically appears in others lol.. could this be because she has an admirer?  Yours, Watchful Wilma  | Dear Watchful, In this particular instance, that little bit of magic is worked by my own nimble fingers and trusty keyboard. However... it may very well be, that your friend does have an admirer. As it happens, your friend is a patient of mine and does have a sparkling personality and charming wit. I can't ethically discuss your friend's problems ... let's just say your friend derives a certain pleasure, in teasing those individuals with a good sense of humor... and active funny bone. lol Sincerely, Dr. Seymon Fraud p.s. i'm taking a refresher course at the university, to bone up on the effects of humor in relieving depression. this course may also, prove benifical to you as well.  | Hi Dr. Fraud; Thank you for getting back to me. I just want to thank you for that tip on Talking to the little lady, course all she said to me was I never listen to anything she has to say, err, I think that's what she said. Anyway after I got finnished telling her what a lousy job she did cooking dinner, I took the neighbor's wife for a little spin, umm, in my new jaguar of course. Would have taken the little lady but she was still ranting and carrying on about not being appreciated err something... Anyway thanks for that advice on getting droopy to stand up and be noticed. A a a a not to be pushy but you didn't tell me what to do next??? Tall Boy!!! | Dear Tall, Don't worry about being pushy.. That IS what comes next. As for your wife and a lousy cooked meal... You want to ruin your new playboy image? Do take the little woman out for a meal. Not only will it save you from a rant and a rave, but you may find a little action on the home front. Sincerely, Dr. Seymon Fraud p.s. practice makes perfect, at least that's my motto. | | Turn | | | | | |
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