| Dear Dr Fraud, I hope you are able to help me. I have this serious masturba errrrr... I mean physchotic ex that just won't DISSAPPEAR and there are times that my fingers just don't know how to stay errrrrrr ... I meant and this stalker who won't take no for an answer. On top of that there is this guy, I can't stop thinking about. When I go to bed I THINK! of him til I can't stop my hands from errrrrr... when I awake I think of him even in the shower..... ....I am sure you know what happens here. My question is... how do I make the ex dissappear, the stalker get a life and leave my own and this guy I am thinking of, how do I get him to TAKE NOTICE? hehehe Your delightful IN sight would be greatly appreciated.
from a beaten down Anjel. Dear Anjel, Take control of this situation. Tell the ex you're getting married to your best girlfriend. He's cured you of men for life. Date a policeman for a few weeks. That should discourage the stalker. As for this guy that hasn't noticed you, forget him. There's obviously something wrong with him. About the other thing you mentioned... you need a hobby. I'm a fishing buff, myself. There is nothing more satisfying, than dropping my pole in a new fishing hole. I look forward to it so much, that I take my equipment out nearly every day... to make sure it is well oiled and in good working order. I'm sure you could find something, that would give you as much pleasure as this does me. Sincerely, Dr. Seymon Fraud p.s. I'm going fishing this week-end. If you'd like to come along, we could tackle this situation together. I will be happy to show you all the ins and outs of my favorite pastime.   | deleting not allowed in Dr. Fraud's column... This was such a wild tale and the author signed another member's name to it... and then deleted it. Dear Desperate Dandelionsblown aka ?, My... My... What a tale. Methinks, that someone is having one over on the doctor, but just in case you are really in need of my help, let me offer some advice. First of all, you have a gender problem. (I'm sure Joe is having a chuckle at my expense and hope he doesn't hit my wallet, next) Or are you just hiding in the closet? On that point, I need clarification before I can procede. My advice to you is take your writing back up. (Letters of this sort are usually written by associates, seeking to test the skills of a fellow writer.) This is the usual oulet for a highly active libido and over active imagination) You do seem to need some help overcoming problems occuring in... shall we say... the private(s) area of your life. It sounds like a nutritional problem and adjusting your diet, may help. Perhaps a dose of red hot chilli peppers, or maybe you lean towards a big mac? Not sure this would help and you may need to switch to something more substantial and filling. Hard to say, without an after hours visit and special treatment. Sincerely,
Dr. Seymon Fraud p.s.... if you have an opening, I am free on saturday to work on this for several hours. My treatments are satisfaction guaranteed or the second time is free. My "dooris" always open to you.  | Dr Seymon Fraud, Thank you for the insight. I will have to give that all a try. As for the offer to go fishing; I may be able to arrange a weekend to go "fishing". Let me know, which is good for you. Since I have already started to respond to you, I wanted to talk to you of a friend I have. We tend to call him "The Keeper". He is a wonderful guy, but seems to be obsessed with sex. He is always making sexual innduedo's, as well as, pointing out just about anything to do with sex. If a little more information is needed let me know. I can point you to some situation's I am speaking of.  For a worried Anjel | Dear Worried, Hmmm... that is unusual. I can't imagine a guy talking to you and thinking of sex. Maybe it is something to do with the kind of work he does. He isn't a gynocolgist, is he? Perhaps, I do need further information. Sincerely, Dr. Seymon Fraud | Turn the Page Index Return to Front Page | | |
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