Welcome aboard... I am your guide for the afternoon.
For lack of a better name, you can refer to me
as, 'hey lady with the pointer'.
On the trip today, we will see none of the usual tourist sights!
I'm sorry, but I am sick of the same route -
it's all a show.
You're only privy to see the posh and glit, New York at it's finest.
You get off this bus
into a cab back to your park avenue hotel suite.
I get off this fumetrap
and i walk.
Through neighborhoods of warehouses and closed-up, closed-off businesses,
over street-people living in their refridgerator-box-houses,
between alleys of shadows, of darkness and paranoia.
There are always footsteps behind -
always walk fast and loud never slow down or turn around.
On your left is a YMCA homeless housing unit.
If you look up to the third floor, see that window near the fire-escape, there he is -
Mr. Joseph Ketter - he's Santa at Macy's.
Or at least he was for twenty-nine years.
He got canned the day after Christmas.
Everybody wave.
Now we'll be going into an area
known as Columbus Circle. We'll stop
here for a while. Go ahead - if you're hungry there's a Sabrette hot dog vendor on the curb.
For those of you who'd like to take pictures,
you'll witness an incredible amount
of drug deals. And, my, aren't they young? Nothing like a sunny afternoon
spent watching strung-out kids
hustling a buck.
OK, now the fun begins.
Let's go to the Wall Street District to pick
out the prostitutes...
As we near the end of the line,
I'd like to thank you for sharing with us, our beautiful city.
As a finale, I just want to tell you that you will be on TV tonight at 5.
You see boys and girls, I've had it!
You are all very nice people, it's this job that sucks!
It's this city that sucks it's the people like a snake will coil, tightly, then suck the life out of a victim,
putting venom into the jugular.
My venom here is this gun...
Now watch my jugular
closely.
© dlc 1987
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