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Guidelines for Reading

Family & Friends

By Lilly

 Most of the psychics I know (including myself) have had to deal with this issue of blending our psychic abilities into our regular life with our family and circle of friends and not always is that an easy thing to do. If your family and friends know about your psychic ability and you use this ability to share with them, there is the necessity to have a policy established. You see, at first glance a psychic thinks that having this gift means that it is a wonderful advantage that they can share easily with friends and loved ones, and yet with having it easily available to share with our loved ones, doesn't preclude that it will be readily acceptable by these people. So one of the easiest parts of being psychic turns into one of the more difficult parts, and it is even harder when a psychic is newly starting out and wants to learn how to give readings and to gain that much needed first-hand experience with giving readings for others.

What does a psychic do? They practice on friends and family first, as it is easier on their nerves rather than to just go out and give a reading to a total stranger, but what I have also mentioned as well is to give readings to those friends and family that are sincerely acceptable to this and willing to have a reading. That's the dividing line there. The psychic is obviously a bit nervous with the first few attempts, so for them it is easier to give a reading to a friendly loved one rather than a stranger. But for the family member or friend, from their standpoint it can be quite a bit different.  Sometimes it is that they think it is a hoax, or they don't believe in it, others might have what I would call a type of "sibling rivalry attitude", or feeling similar to that.  With some people there is the problem of accepting the ability of the psychic person when they know that friend or family member well and are bothered that the psychic in their family or circle of friends has something that they perhaps don't and then it goes into the area of jealousy.  Now I know it isn't something that is a positive thing but nonetheless there is this element of jealousy that does come as a side effect sometimes by others with Gifts of the Spirit. "How come you have this gift and I don't? I've known you for years and now you have this showing up, and I don't, or don't have it like you do?" This  tendency would show up more with those who are at your level generationally speaking. 

In the Bible there is the mentioning of this with Jesus:

Matthew 13:53-58
53 And when Jesus had finished these parables, he went away from there, 54 and coming to his own country he taught them in their synagogue, so that they were astonished, and said, "Where did this man get this wisdom and these mighty works? 55 Is not this the carpenter's son? Is not his mother called Mary? And are not his brothers James and Joseph and Simon and Judas? 56 And are not all his sisters with us? Where then did this man get all this?" 57 And they took offense at him. But Jesus said to them, "A prophet is not without honor except in his own country and in his own house." 58 And he did not do many mighty works there, because of their unbelief.

 Jesus had to deal with this, and I know psychics don't in the least compare to the Lord Jesus' abilities, but you can sense the general similarities. Jesus was able to give divine guidance and aid to those people yet there in his own country where the townspeople knew him as an average child before were disturbed that he now had these wonderful abilities.  I know that was 2,000 years ago, but  Jesus was quoting from something He already knew from knowing the Old Testament scriptures with a prophet not being accepted and honored by their own country. 

 People are people, and somethings change with people's basic attitudes, and somethings don't with some folks.  I know I've had to deal with it in my family.  There are those in my family I mention my being psychic to, and others I have not ever said anything to.  I know i've written about the basics with mediumship ethics, but felt that there is a need to focus here on just some guidelines  especially for working with family and friends with our psychic ability.  No one wants conflicts to arise, as the whole effort of Gifts of the Spirit are to aid others, and we want this to balance itself out well in the long run. In order to be better equipped to prevent any conflicts within our personal relationships, here are some guidelines as to what to say or how to say what you are psychically sensing for these special people in your life:

 Keep in mind the ethics key guidelines when doing mediumship. Notice when it will be mentioning something that is of a personal nature and how you say it makes all the difference in the world with speaking to family and friends. They are more susceptible and possibly more vulnerable to what you are saying, as you are more close to them and can be more emotionally affected by what is given. That is why tact and diplomacy is clearly a necessity here, and to be especially non-judgmental with the presentation of information.  It is highly recommended to not get too personal within the reading with issues.  Issues about personal relationships with your family members could also make you the "middle-man" here with getting involved in how it all could evolve, and you wouldn't want anything like that to happen.  If there is a conflict within the family and the Readee inquires about what steps to take, (i.e. a sister-in-law contemplating divorcing your brother, ask to not have that subject be something that you would give a reading on).  All does reflect into the whole family, so being involved too deeply like that could cause ramifications futher along.

 Deal with subjects that will not include too personal a nature with a friend or family member.  Focus on the positive, and keep it more a social reason, or Spirit contact rather than counseling.  With a general psychic whom the person doesn't know, the Readee goes away from the reading and doesn't have to see that psychic ever again if there was a problem with the way the Readee was dealt with, but with a family member, you will obviously be seeing that family member always, so it doesn't behoove you to have a reading with any information coming through that isn't presented in such a way as to give hope and positive information. Even if there is some issues with negativity, try to deal with this in such a way as to bring forth a loving way of presenting it so that the recipient doesn't have any bitter feelings develop.

 Don't over-do giving readings for the special people in your life. Initially you can ask them and offer to give them a reading, but if they show you that they aren't interested, (and you can witness their expressions which perhaps say a lot more than just their verbal responses), or if on the phone and you sense a hesitation there or awkwardness, don't offer again. I first practiced giving readings for my Mother and my husband, but my Mother was genuinely wishing for a reading, and my husband wasn't. He went along with it, but it was amazing how quickly his eyelids got too heavy to keep open, so I got the "hint", and haven't given him a reading since and that's been many years ago. If you do practice with your family members and they are willing, remember that it still is all recorded with their having these special gifts of readings recorded on THEIR Akashic Record, which makes it known to the guides who come. They are willing to come for a time, but then when there is too much activity with special information given, this blessing does feel pulled away for those individuals if it's gone on too much. So if you start to give someone a reading and don't get anything, or you feel a kind of short message, then the sensation of feeling a "pulling away of the energy link", then let it go. It has been too much given for that particular Readee. Remember life here is much like a huge school, and life lessons are important, so you don't want to hamper or interfere with their Life Chart in learning their planned lessons, anymore than you would want to complete your children's homework everyday. 

Being "On Tap": If you are sought after for your psychic readings by friends and family and you sense that you are being taken advantage of, you must have guidelines of your own, so that you won't hamper their own spiritual growth. Once your accuracy is established within your circle of family and friends, you could be contacted solely for being asked questions about their situations, and what starts out as a phone call visit can easily turn into a reading situation. If you sense that this is happening and you notice that you are linking to your Heart Chakra to do a reading, also notice that you must have a plan ahead of time with this whole situation with your ability. You might want to have a pre-planned statement how you feel about giving readings for every occasion when they contact you and to let them know firmly but in a friendly way the situation. It doesn't do them any good to have you "on tap" like the kitchen faucet anytime they want to have a guidance reading, and they themselves don't figure out their own problems. Coping Skills and Ways and Means Category are two areas of basic life achievements that are necessary for our spiritual growth, and are much like a "Benchmark" in scholastic achievement programs here on Earth. Ways and Means Category is the category whereby we ourselves must figure out our own life problems with us doing it as much as possible. So in other words, the more we put out effort to figure out our own problems and not relying on others solely to do that, the better equipped we become to handle life problems, and that is a major achievement for our Spirits.

Practicing on your family members to gain experience with readings is perfectly all right as long as it is done properly with a set of standards and policy that you have worked out ahead of time with them, so it won't interfere with your personal relationship with these people. It can complicate your personal life and cause rifts with friends if it isn't done properly. You want the information you share to be accurate, and to uplift and be of genuine help to them. I know that Sylvia Browne's son, Chris, has written a book about his experience growing up with a psychic. I also remember that Hugh Lynn Cayce has been interviewed about how it was like growing up with Edgar Cayce, his father, and there is the similarities expressed about the challenges and difficulties, as well as the blessings being related to such a high level psychic, so no matter whether or not you are a advanced psychic or at a beginning level with this, you need to have a plan and be settled with a policy you have worked out with your set of values and ethics here so you won't jeopardize your psychic abilities, or your family relationships and  friendship with your loved ones.  © Copyright 2005 - All Rights Reserved