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All Message Boards : Anger phase-what is the worst you have done to N?
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 Message 1 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknameup2me-az  (Original Message)Sent: 15/11/2008 8:31 a.m.
It's been eight weeks NC and I am going into the anger phase of recovery (I think).  Distance helps me see that xN litters the world with broken people, his women, his OW's, his children, his employees, and he will never run out of NS. 
 
Has anyone else wanted to expose him, strike back, turn the smear campaign on him?  What is the worst you have done and did it help your recovery?
 
Up2me


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 Message 15 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknamegoingnorth2Sent: 16/11/2008 8:45 a.m.
SexyDevil,
 
Very appropriate payback! 
 
All they talk is crap anyway. 
 
GN
 
 

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The number of members that recommended this message. 0 recommendations  Message 16 of 30 in Discussion 
Sent: 16/11/2008 11:11 a.m.
This message has been deleted by the author.

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 Message 17 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknameharmony615Sent: 16/11/2008 11:13 a.m.
sexy devil..right on.. I have had a patternt with N's . This one lasted for 8 months. Same ol same all realing me in with his charm etc. He aslo has a child in which he displays I would say for a long time amotional abuse..profuse language and anger problems. The last episode where he througha dart into his lady flatmates head who he had sex with and probably did while he was with me etc etc. He displayed this behaviour and others in front of his 9 years old. It was his birthday. I have sine reported him to child safety and he has lost all rights to his son, who has become desentitized by his BS. I am still angry as yes they seem to find nice women which they will use until they can'y stand it anymore. I am not good at NC as I have sent some nasty text messages or the truth. I am livid with anger and hurt. However NC i know is the only way as I am still giving him ATTENTION!
peace

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 Message 18 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknamethx-rachelSent: 16/11/2008 3:47 p.m.
IMHO there is no point in striking back at an N--they will never get it anyway and at the first opportunity they will turn it back on you to punish you. We already know they will never change.  Don't waste your valuable time and energy--turn it inward to motivate yourself to move on to something better.
 
Here's the worst thing I did to my XN:
 
I left him......I started my life over.........and I'm profoundly happy without him. 
 
 
I recommend it highly.
 
 

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 Message 19 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknameselly2097Sent: 16/11/2008 4:45 p.m.
yep...I agree the worst thing I ever did was stop being his ns...tho I let him speak to me like trash and let him hang the ph up...and I did not react....been nearly a week now....NC for me!

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 Message 20 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN NicknamemrseggcupSent: 16/11/2008 6:50 p.m.
 After 30 years of hearing him brag about his high school track career (which ended there) I threw his letter sweater, medals, and other track awards on a huge bonfire.  Childish, I know, but VERY satisfying.  That was 5 years ago, we are 4 years divorced and he still doesn't know.  It's nothing compared to what I have lost.

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 Message 21 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN NicknameMentalMonaSent: 16/11/2008 10:31 p.m.
I am still with n for now, but when I found out he took ow to his daughter's high school graduation 9 hours away, I went nuts!!! Because he met the Pilsbury Dough-Ho at his job at the Mall (how lame), I took it out on his work stuff. He came home from his trip and found his work boots filled with cat poop and maple syrup, his lunch bag filled with hamburger helper, his uniforms shredded, and for the big one, put an ad on Craigs' List telling everything, including posting thier pics!!!
 
 
I figured after all these years of being called "Crazy", I would show him just how crazy I could get!!! But of course, it was my fault he cheated on me, or so he reasoned. I just wish I had known all of this about NPD back in June!!!

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 Message 22 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN NicknamefemfreeSent: 16/11/2008 10:45 p.m.
Good tactic Trinity. Give these guys enough rope!!

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 Message 23 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN NicknameladyvharsenSent: 17/11/2008 2:29 p.m.
Shalom all,
 
Just like most of the excellent responses on here, I did absolutely GORNISCHT!  (tr:  nothing) and that meant NO contact (NO:  e-mails, picking up the phone, answering the door) 
So the best story got to me about a year after I began my "Zero tolerance for the Zero" policy...apparently, the N went to the police (we lived about 2 hours away) and said that I was being held against my will and could not answer his calls/e-mails/etc.  When that didn't get him the results he wanted, he told the police that I had called him and said I was going to commit suicide (friends, I hadn't spoken to the a$$hole for several months by that point) and a policeman was actually dispatched to my apartment.  I was out with some friends when this happened, but there was a note on my door asking me to please call as a "welfare check."  I called--the officers were very very nice and I explained the situation to them.
Well, the N goes back to his local police station after he still doesn't get any supply from me and makes SUCH an ASS out of himself, he actually gets THROWN out of the police station with the warning that he was never to come back unless he had a legitimate complaint.
Now honestly friends, thrown IN to the police station I've heard of--being thrown OUT was a new one on me.  lololololololololol  ROFLMAO at the memory!
Love,
LadyV

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Sent: 18/11/2008 1:05 p.m.
This message has been deleted due to termination of membership.

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 Message 25 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN NicknameSailorsgirlSent: 21/11/2008 7:44 p.m.
I once had a female "N" supervisor, whose husband died suddenly and unexpectedly 6 months after my dear Mom passed away suddenly and unexpectedly.
 
Although my "N" boss went to my Mom's funeral, she had absolutely NO sympathy or empathy for me while I was at work.  As far as my "N" boss was concerned, it was "bullying (er, business) as usual"  for me.
 
Did I go to her husband's funeral?  Nope.  I did tell her that I was sorry for her loss and gave her some "grief " books to read (that helped me when my Mom passed away).  She told me that she gave the books to her adult daughter.
 
 

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 Message 26 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nickname1naturaSent: 22/11/2008 1:43 a.m.
XN emailed a pic after he d&d'd me after months of N-type pig behaviour. It was pic of him getting an award for racing car stuff ( probably for best smashes, most last placings etc..). Anyway I have used this pic for time to time for healing purposes - such as cut out his face and burn it on the fire, and / or put it in the trash and / or deposit various unspeakable waste products on it.
 
The gods are supporting me on this until I get him completely out of my system - and it is very satisfying and healing.

Reply
 Message 27 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN NicknameAngelicaBlue76Sent: 25/11/2008 8:29 p.m.
Dear thx-rachel,
 
Yours is the greatest payback scenario I have ever heard.  I HOPE I have the strength to do exactly as you have done.  Anything else is just beating my own head against a wall, and I wouldn't mind going into my next decade with a FEW brain cells left. 
 
I am so looking forward to NEVER speaking to him again, after I'm gone in 3-ish weeks!!!!!
 
Angelica

Reply
 Message 28 of 30 in Discussion 
From: dogwhisperSent: 25/11/2008 9:42 p.m.
Have no fear the Ns will self destruct at any given moment. It helps to look at it this way, He is his own worst enemy and the way I look at it is I picture his brain and in it is a Hamster on a wheel going out of control......peace to all this forum is a great help to the survivors...

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 Message 29 of 30 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknamecopgrrl8Sent: 27/11/2008 8:47 a.m.
My N is very vain.  I like to paint and 15 years ago I painted a portrait of him.  I was in love.  Oh boy. He loved that he had a portrait of himself.  Well on my birthday in May I took that painting of the wall and out of the frame.  I took it out in the yard and poured tiki torch oil all over it and lit it on fire.  It was like a release as I watched  it burn, everything went up in smoke and I was free from his smirk on the wall.  At the beginning of November he sent a list of things he still wanted from the house.  The painting was one of them.  I told my lawyer he couldn't have it and why.  I love the response he put on the letter to his lawyer.  He cannot have the portrait because she painted it and she burnt it.  Aww.  I really did feel better.  I have contemplated doing the same to pictures but that isn't fair to the kids, so I had I idea of making color copies and everytime I need a release from him I could burn a copy.

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