NARCISSISTIC_PERSONALITY

About 3.5 months ago, I was hiding the gum -- to ensure that I'd have it when I wanted it. I'd leave out half a dozen packs for the two of us. And I'd hide a few more packs.

Out of the half dozen I'd leave out, I'd get maybe one pack. The rest would be sucked up lickity split.

Oh yes. I do know that when there is true love, something so petty as who takes all the gum wouldn't even be an issue. But it didn't stop with the gum. It was everything. Because he was entitled to it all. And for him, he had the ready alibi of, "I'm an addict in recovery. If I like something, I can't control myself. Well, let's just be grateful I'm in recovery."

It's weird and sad, on one hand, that I would find pleasure in something so far out and goofy as having all the gum to myself.

But I'm not going to make light of a simple pleasure -- no matter how "simple" it is.

And for those of you who remain in contact . . .

There will be no little pleasures -- no matter how small and insignificant they may seem -- until you become N-Free.

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Message 2 of 3 in Discussion

From:

blindfor35years

Sent: 12/11/2008 7:44 p.m.

This is a good thread. (You should re-post it on the new board, GN).

One of my simple NC pleasures:

The nh had "his" chair in our little TV room. He was a slob, and he was always eating, so "his" chair and the floor around it was always covered with tons and TONS of crumbs and stray bits of food. Just as though a 3 year old had been sitting there. No, just as though three! 3 year olds had been sitting there.

After I kicked him out I just loved looking at that crumb-free chair and floor. And now that I've sold the house and he took a lot of the furniture, I don't have to look at his chair at all!

I found a really nice, comfy, elegant leather chair on super sale. One he would have objected to buying because it's not quite gimungous enough to contain His Pot-Bellyness easily.

My living room looks totally great--with nary a crumb in sight!

Message 3 of 3 in Discussion

From: had enough

Sent: 13/11/2008 1:57 a.m.

Hi GN,

I know exactly what you mean. I would put out olives for all of us to eat. The xnh would pass by the table as I was putting the olives and the rest of the food on the table and would stuff all the olives in his mouth, except one. As if that one would make it right! There were six of us who loved olives. So I got to where I would put the olives out last, and at the other end of the table so that all of us could pass them and share before he began stuffing them down. He did it so fast that I don't really think he could taste them well. He did this with other things too. If the kids would leave candy out at their places at the table, he would eat their candies without remorse. Its that stupid entitlement thing. And, of course, he was the only one who counted at our house in his mind.

I agree, the simple pleasures of being free, not having to fight for anything are huge.

Hugs,

Had Enough