N-mom moved in with us in New Orleans almost three years ago at our invitation.  She sold her house in Philadelphia and got a nice chunck of change for it.  It has been hell ever since.  She wanted to move back to Philadelphia from about two month in but we  (both my husband and I) thought she would adjust.  Did not happen and just got worse and worse.  She has pulled all the usuall N-mother stuff and has pretty much knocked down the little bit of progress I had made in my therapy for lack of self esteem, anixity and depression.  Now that we agreed that she needs to go back to Philly and I had started looking on the internet and contacted two real estate agents there she changed her mind  and said that it would be better to stay in this area and find a house.  I said fine so at least she could have her own place and I could still look after her but have my own house to go back to.  We found a house right down the street and she made a rediculously low bid on it.  The owner did not accept her offer but dropped the asking price.  She didn't bother to tell me that he dropped the price and she told the real estate agent that she wouldn't offer any more.  Then we told her that there are several other houses in the area that are more in her price range.  Oh by the way I have no idea how much money she has because she says she was told be senior citizen in Philly not to tell anyone that information.  We made an apt. to see another house that was a lot less money for the following day.  That morning she comes out of her room and tells me to call the agent and tell her that she does not want to look anymore.  She is a sick woman and she is tired.  I told her to call her herself.  Several days later in the doctors office she brings up the subject and says I am cold and don't understand all the heartach she has.  "I lost everything and am here were no one talks to me and all you do is take me to the doctors.  Buying a house is a big deal"  I told her that I know that but she has to make a decision and stick to it.  Then she really started in on me.  "I can't say anything to you.  You are overly sensative."  I told her yes I am so why do you keep saying stuff to me.   If you can't say something nice just don't say anything.  Please"  Then she informed me that "you have mental problems thats why you see that therapist.  I only go to the center because I am a people person and I need people that will listen and talk with me."  Anyway now it doesn't seem like she wants to go anywhere.  SHE HAS TO GO!  I just don't know how to approach it.  See I still have trouble believing that this my mother that has no feeling for her child.  I still want that number 10 mother and I kown she is a #1 if even that.  She hurts for the sake of hurting and I fight to be the oposite of that so to tell her get out is killing me. How do i do this.  I am going to call her therapist and speak to her but I know I will encounter someone who thinks mom is so cute and that she is a pistle.  She is a pistle and she shoots me every chance she get.  Any suggestions I am listening.  Take care and God bless all of you.