Advice from a professional psychiatric nurse.
“I am a psychiatric nurse and have often worked with this type of client [Narcissistic PD} on our admission unit. They are considered to be one of the most difficult to work with. As the discussion mentions at the base of this is poor self-esteem and an inability to accept consequences. How do we work with this type of client? Focus on the behaviors that are acceptable and not acceptable. Set limits. Family members should agree on what they are and be consistent. Set up consequences and work as a group.
It is strongly suggested that we do not ignore the behaviors for two reasons. Firstly, the person learns that there are not consequences for what he says or does. Secondly, this could lead to and "acting out" (act of verbal or physical aggression). These behaviors should be totally unacceptable and the family should make that clear. Set limits. Agree upon what is ok and not ok and all members should do the same thing. Example: Asking the person to leave, giving a firm "no" and ending the discussion. When the behaviors are neutral or even pleasant, point out that that time was positive. When they are not, point them out in a non-judgemental fashion and set the limit. The prognosis is poor for this type of personality disorder. Often these people are rejected and alone over time. Of course these are my thoughts and not everyone will agree with me.
Hope whatever I added gives some help."

My advice to you is to immediately stop engaging in "unconditional love". Narcissists sense blood where others see only love and altruism. If �?for masochistic reasons, which are beyond me �?you still wish to engage this young person, my chief advice to you would be to condition your love. Sign a contract with him: you want my adoration, admiration, approval, warmth, you want my home and money available to you as an insurance policy? If you do �?these are my conditions. And if he says that he doesn't want to have anything to do with you anymore �?count your blessings and let go. Omar al-Khayyam, the famous Persian poet once wrote: when you want to have the bird �?set it free.
Adolescent Narcissist A Case Study FAQ #16 By: Dr. Sam Vaknin
http://samvak.tripod.com/faq16.html

http://groups.msn.com/CopingwiththePsychopathNarcissistChild/coping.msnw