My personal opinion?

 

I think they keep it under hat in hope that you'll stay in the relationship with N as long as possible.  Why?  Because it keeps him/her off of their backs!  I think they enjoy the peace (however temporary it will be), while he's busy sucking the life out of somebody else.  They know if they tell you what he really is, they risk 2 things:  First being that you'll leave and then they'll have him up their butts again, and secondly, they fear retaliation from him for "spilling the beans."

 

And, of course, it could very well be that the whole family is nuts...as was the case in my situation.  If you're dysfunctional enough, how can you detect "abnormal" from "normal?"  So in their dysfunctional eyes, the N is perfectly "normal."

 

Sick, sick, sick!!!

 

~Resist~