I heard a phsycologist on radio outline the characteristics of N's.  I knew they were screwed up and disfunctional, and made our family a circus,  hell I didn't know there was a name for it.  We recently lost our mom, which was the only person either really cared for (they despise me).  I'm the executor and am trying to settle the estate.  Other two siblings are well trained co-dependents.  What a nightmare.  Typically we've always dealt with them by letting them do whatever they want to avoid the hostility, anger, histronics, drama, violence.  As an adult I bailed and stayed away (as did the other two non N's, I'm a little more forceful).  I've got to deal with them now, and I can't do it by avoidance or letting them have their way.  Help....any suggestions?