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General : Continue abuse after breakup--Plumfrog & all
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 Message 1 of 6 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknamenotyouroption  (Original Message)Sent: 30/10/2008 3:20 a.m.
He just wants word to get back to you that's all. That's the only way he can continue to abuse you!--Plumfrog---you said this in another post

I'm trying to grasp this along with other things. Why do they do this? Why do they want to keep you hurting????? I know they want to and figured he was after this, but why? Anyone with any ideas???



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Sent: 30/10/2008 3:30 a.m.
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 Message 3 of 6 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknamebumpy_rider2Sent: 30/10/2008 3:39 a.m.
It's purely an ego thing. They hurt you because it's a big ego boost for them. They are incredibly warped. Imagine hurting somebody that loves you, because it makes you feel better about yourself? That's why they do it.

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 Message 4 of 6 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknamegoingnorth2Sent: 30/10/2008 3:40 a.m.
Why do they want to keep you hurting?????
 
I think mine is a little different.  I mean that I don't think he necessarily WANTS to see me hurt. 
 
Having said that . . .
 
I know he doesn't CARE if I am hurt. 
 
It's just that he doesn't sit around thinking up things to do to hurt me. 
 
Having said THAT . . . 
 
If, on the right hand, there is something he wants to do or have, and on the left hand, he can avoid hurting me by not choosing what's on the right hand . . .
 
The man (term used loosely) is choosing the right hand and he does not care if I get hurt or not. 
 
And that's all perfectly okay and not his fault. 
 
And he can prove that. 
 
Becaue he's a therapist (no he isn't -- he's an addictions counselor) and as they know very well in the world of psycho-babble -- if I feel hurt, it's because I CHOOSE to feel hurt. 
 
Voila!  He's off the hook. 
 
Gloria
(Trust me.  He really IS "off the hook.")
 
 
 

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Sent: 30/10/2008 5:34 a.m.
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 Message 6 of 6 in Discussion 
From: XtraMSN Nicknamerayannegraff2Sent: 30/10/2008 5:56 a.m.
My xN that I dumped a year ago still will do anything in his power to hurt me. He's actually been pretty successful now and then when I take the bait but those days are over. He's gone so far as to make fun of my sexual performance (which is funny considering he always asks ME for sex lol), call me a slut, whore, a bitch, c**t, etc. He's totally insane, today he told me he is going to purposely bump into me at the bars I go to (which he never goes to). He also has told me he's had sex with my friends when he's been angry (which is bull, and he always immediately takes back because he knows it's so unbelievable) and that he has gotten someone pregnant.

Oh, and today he said people just want to have sex with me, no one actually wants to be with me. That stung even though I laughed it off.

Unlike goingnorth, my xN WANTS to see me hurt....

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